“Be” and “Have”: how English and French think differently

Some mistakes never really disappear.After years of teaching, I still hear them regularly — not just from beginners, but from learners at every CEFR level.

One of the most persistent is the confusion between “be” and “have” in English and “être” and “avoir” in French.

I see this both with learners of English and learners of French, whether in face-to-face lessons in Vincennes or through online education. The frustration is always the same: “I know the rule, but I still say it wrong.”

The issue is not memory. It’s how each language organises meaning.

The illusion of equivalence

At first, everything seems straightforward:

• be = être

• have = avoir

This apparent symmetry is exactly what causes the problem. Learners assume that the same idea must use the same verb in both languages.

In my classes in Vincennes, even advanced learners still produce sentences like I have cold or I am 25 years. These are not careless mistakes. They are logical conclusions based on the learner’s first language.

Physical states: where confusion starts early

Physical sensations are often the first area where errors appear.

In French, these sensations are usually expressed with avoir:

• j’ai froid

• j’ai faim

• j’ai soif

• j’ai peur

In English, the same experiences are framed as states:

• I am cold

• I am hungry

• I am thirsty

• I am afraid

When I work with learners through private tutoring in English, this difference often feels arbitrary to them. Why would hunger be something you are rather than something you have?

English speakers learning French experience the same confusion in reverse, especially when they try to say je suis froid or je suis faim. The error pattern mirrors itself perfectly.

Age: possession in French, state in English

Age is one of the clearest illustrations of how differently the two languages conceptualise reality.

In French, age is treated as something you possess:

• j’ai 30 ans

In English, age is expressed as a state:

• I am 30

This point comes up constantly in my English course in Vincennes, and not only with beginners. Learners often know the rule but hesitate when speaking, which shows that the mental shift has not fully happened.

The same hesitation appears with English speakers learning French, because age feels permanent — and permanent things feel like states in English.

Feelings and situations: beyond simple rules

Expressions of tiredness, readiness, fear or delay reveal the deeper pattern.

English generally uses be:

• I am tired

• I am ready

• I am late

French frequently prefers avoir:

• j’ai sommeil

• j’ai peur

• j’ai du retard

In my private tutoring in French, learners often try to memorise lists of expressions. The problem is that lists don’t explain why the verbs differ, so the errors keep returning.

What English and French are really doing

Once learners step back, the pattern becomes clearer.

English tends to describe how someone is at a given moment.French often describes what someone has internally.

This difference has nothing to do with logic or simplicity. It’s about perspective. When learners encounter this idea — whether in class or through e-learning — the mistakes stop feeling random.

Understanding the system is far more effective than memorising exceptions.

Practical strategies I give my students

First, stop translating word for word. Translation reinforces the wrong reflex.

Second, learn expressions as chunks. I am cold should feel like a single unit, not a sentence you build.

Third, group expressions by pattern. Learners following an English course with CPF often make faster progress once they actively notice these groupings.

Finally, self-correct out loud. Saying I have cold — sorry, I am cold helps rewire instinctive speech.

Conclusion

Confusion between be and have is not a beginner problem. It’s a conceptual one, which is why it persists for years.

Once learners understand how English and French frame experience differently, accuracy improves naturally. This shift is one of the most important moments in long-term progress — whether you are learning independently or with a teacher.

Grammar rules tell you what to say.Understanding how a language thinks explains why — and that changes everything.